Tyler Vega Y12 Nuclear Complex, Oak Ridge Tennessee To The United Nations Nuclear Non-proliferation Treaty Talks New York, New York - 2005

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Advanced Scouts, Gone But Not Forgotten    The Advance Scout team began day one with Mario and Kip on Cycles and myself running. It was only a couple miles, somewhat like a preseason test, and an appropriate time to gauge whether or not one could accomplish an advance scout mission on foot. I came to the conclusion that it would be unreasonably difficult. Since this is a brand new idea, I/we got to make it up as we went. We rode ahead and passed out flyers in businesses along the route that the walk would pass by shortly thereafter. Day one held little by way of interesting conversations, and was mostly a day for settling into the unsettledness of doing something new.    Day two started with both Kip and Mario having chosen to walk instead of ride, and Ruthie and Concetta in attendance both for the first time. High turnover at this job, apparently.    I only later figured out why. We set out from Y-12 at a fast pace, experiencing some trouble with Concetta's trailer (in which Cosmo the dog rode), which we dealt with. We pressed on and flyered at the few and far between businesses that were open at that hour. Conversations were excellent, and we had plenty of time to give people all the attention they needed. The usual reactions of amazement settled into real person to person discussion on a good number of occasions.    After a short break and our first contact with a support vehicle, we hit our first down hill and cut loose, wind in the hair and high as a kite, only to watch Cosmo's trailer flip completely over. I just about messed my pants, but Concetta held on and kept stable and Cosmo was completely unhurt. With impeccable timing, Jim pulled up in the minivan. The trailer was out of commission, so I asked Concetta to take a bike, the trailer, Cosmo and the stuff back to Ralph and Lisa's and sort it out. I took Concetta's bike for it's speedometer and the fact that it's insanely fast and I wanted to see what it could do. A recommendation to barefooters: don't ride bikes intended for cleated shoes.    Ruthie and I pressed on with only mild directional difficulty and enjoyed a good ride and more interesting conversations. I should speak for myself only, as we only very rarely entered businesses or approached people together. The few times we did seemed to be more effective in creating open conversation. My front tire popped as we pulled into a small business, and I got to see Ruthie's mechanical prowess for the second time. She had it fixed (with a little, and I do mean a little, help from me) in about ten minutes. We moved on into the urban areas with mild success. Many were interested, many were not. I began to get tired and my people skills suffered, and I could tell that Ruthie was experiencing the same. We broke for lunch and began flyering selectively rather than every single business, relying on intuition and logic to make the choices. Gas stations seem to be the only type of business that ought to always be approached, because the walkers often stop to use restrooms or parking lots of gas stations. It seems to really help to let them know that they're coming.    As we got more worn out it seemed more and more that we were on the wrong track, and knowing that the walk was going to end long before the actual destination, and just about then my rear brake went nearly dead. Ruthie to the rescue again, we were back to functionality within a half hour. Through the conversation, we soon realized that we both wanted to be with the walk, so we turned around and rejoined, figuring that we had already flyered as far as the walk would get that day. This turned out to be an exceptionally empowering decision, as being back with the walk refueled my spirit like nothing else. The day ended with the walkers being shuttled to the church in vehicles while Mario, Chihiro, Alissa and I Jammed. Ruthie had business to take care of, so I ended up riding the last several miles to the church solo and had time to reflect on the first full day of the advance scouts. That night it Ruthie and Concetta asked to speak to me, and we held a small circle, in which it became clear that Jun-San was opposed to the advance scout presence on the walk. I wasn't entirely clear why, but she had apparently asked Ruthie not to ride. I cannot help but suspect that it was the same with Kip and Mario. I then told Concetta and Ruthie that I had anticipated some resistance from her, but had cleared it with the walk organizers months ago, and this was indeed why I had come to this walk (well, that and music anyway) and that unless Jim or Marcus told me not to ride, I was going to continue on. I was also all jazzed up about the possibility of riders hauling baggage, because I can only imagine how powerful a walk that was free of the addiction to petroleum could be. I had visions all night of the three riders hauling the big red trailer with all the walkers baggage in it. Impossible at this stage of the game, but the future has no holds barred.    The morning started strong, with a wonderful conversation between Tall Tommy and I. Tommy is one of the stewards of the Knoxville Bike Library that loaned me the Grand Teton that I was riding. He also interviewed me for his class and pointed us to a bike trail behind the church that was stunningly beautiful. What a way to start the day! Wind in the hair! We backtracked to Natures Pantry after leaving a few flyers at a co-op and a bike store and I had the pleasure of catching an employee entering the building an hour or so before opening. They had donated a pile of food for us, and Nat had specifically asked me to go there and inform them of our passing the day before. She beat me there and was leaving in the Pooper Trooper just as we rode up, But I got to talk to him. Neener neener neener. Swell guy. Can't remember his name.    The walk was just arriving as we finished our conversation, so we (Concetta and I, Ruthie wanted to start with the walk) headed up stream flyering and sprinting, flyering and sprinting, staying well ahead of the walk. It was an intense time, as the walkers are quite persistent. It was around that time that I started thinking of the Tortoise and the Hare analogy. Concetta and I developed a system of waiting at every stoplight to make eye contact and give a signal so that we didn't lose each other. She prefers to ride in the street, so she took the right side. I like off-roading, so I stayed on the left. Once I crossed over, for what reason I don't know, and had my first seriously negative reaction from a construction worker who thought we should blow "them" all to smithereens. I bid him shalom and pressed on.    At the rest break shortly thereafter I approached Jun-San, wishing she had come to me rather than everyone around me. That morning she had approached Concetta, saying that it was taking away from her walk and the walk. What she had to say to me was that people had come there to walk and that I was taking them away from it, that she knew my character and that no one had asked her if bikes could come. This was of little effect on me, since I did come to ride, did invite Concetta to ride, and the people that came to walk were now all walking.    I'm still not sure exactly what the dynamics of Jun-San, Marcus and Jim come down to as far as leadership, only that it works with some beautiful grace that I'm now writing music about. The walk needed to press on, so we didn't get to finish our conversation. I rode on, processing and creating my job.    There was little to do in the long stretch of residential sections near the previous nights stay place, so we got a long ways ahead. The Afternoon went by quickly, and I felt we were too far ahead, so we stopped for a cup of tea. Feels like a poor decision in retrospect, but we made a connection inside and soon saw the walkers approaching. Perhaps they didn't break at the Unitarian Universalist Church.    We hopped back on and had a time of it. Now, staying ahead of the walk was extremely challenging in such an urban setting, but we gradually pulled away, and I then figured it was probably better to stay near the walk, for the sake of being able to interact with people who were there when the walk was there. We were about to hit downtown, and this part became very interesting. The walkers took an unexpected turn and I lost Concetta when I rerouted, so I had to split my mind and time between interactions and looking for her. I eventually returned to the walk and borrowed Kip's phone to call her and we all arrived at the next break point together. At that time we developed the next strategy, which was using three bikes (Ruthie wanted to ride again). Two in front on both sides of the street, and one in back to talk to people who wanted to talk and then catch up. Ruthie had been doing that all day, so I swapped with her. It also became clear that this position could run errands for walkers (I fetched some newspapers for Jun-San via Kip and still need to give him his $3 change). and could easily haul a small trailer with food and water for breaks and/or lunch and a fair amount of walker gear such as coats and drum bags and such. I offered later to take on lunch, but it was declined.    After lunch was the most intense time. We stared at the same time as the walk, so we were right with them for a long time. We had just decided to stay within earshot of the drums, and didn't realize what we were getting into. People's reactions to the walk itself and to a flyer about the walk were quite different. We had also crossed into the Black part of Knoxville, and naturally the character of conversation changes some. This part was a ton of fun despite the intensity. I got in some of the best off-roading in my personal history, pushed my body to it's limit, and met some really cool people. The highlight was in this little video game parlor full of young black men who where checking out the walk just as I rolled up. I told them a bit about it and got some great reaction when I showed them the cut out bottoms of my shoes and the super-gnarly pads I've developed on them. We shared a moment of wondrous laughter, happily at my expense. I had several similar interactions in that same little strip, it seemed to be some sort of social nexus. I also met a man named Clyde who was formerly a foreman at Y-12. He said he had some stories and that he tried to take care of his people. I told him my number was on the flyer and that I'd love to hear his stories. He sent his prayers with us and I pressed on.    The next highlight was two old white men in an antique store. One couldn't read due to eyesight, so I told him about the walk from an interfaith standpoint. He was a veteran of one of the world wars and I remember him saying "You can tell which ones are Christians by the way they pray in a fox-hole under fire. That's where I found god, in a fox-hole in France". He sent his prayers with us too.    As we left town, I began to meet more pro-nuclear people, one woman felt we should keep them because Korea has them. Many people were standoffish, as I am with people with flyers enough of the time. All in all, people are pretty much people though, doing what they do. The walk is ultimately a change in an otherwise ordinary day.    At first break after lunch Jim sat me down for the heavy. Jun-San had gone to him too and was putting pressure on me through him. He handled it exceptionally well, saying that it was up to me to make the decision to ride or not ride, and that I should take the time to really listen to her. I was feeling pretty reactive and hiding from it, but fortunately he called me on it saying "you know, Tyler, this is the first time we've ever talked that you haven't looked at me". Our mutual respect is so strong, and it shone through in that moment like never before. We parted way with a hug and I rode on to catch the walkers deep in my own thoughts. Ultimately, it was my respect for Jun-San versus what I thought was right that I was wrestling with.    As the day wore on my heart became heavier. I could feel the extra stress on Jim and Concetta. I wished Jun-San would talk to me instead of them. The route became increasingly rural and my job as an advance scout petered to nothing. The cyclists again joined the walk and I distracted myself by practicing Japanese with Kijiha while he practiced English. Later the walk was again shuttled to the stay place, Blaine Town Hall, and I rode with Concetta and Paul, who wanted to take Ruthie's bike for a bit. No doubt this fueled Jun-San's fire.    As I rode home I felt myself sinking, and to top it off, I had broken a spoke in my back tire which was creating a drag against the breaks once per rotation. I felt it was symbolic of the community of walkers, either Jun-San and/or I being the broken spoke. I try to look at me first, and so I dug in to my insides, looking for the deepest truth. Between my respect for Jun-San and the metaphor of the bike, I opened fully to the possibility of letting go of the bikes, and was then challenged only by the effect that would have on Concetta. We talked a bit as we rode (she waited for me, I was going ridiculously slow) and found some clarity. When we arrived I left the group to go play my song to settle my mind and then meditated for a bit. As I let go of the ego, intuition spoke clearly. I was to trust my elder and let go of the bicycle. Even now it is confirmed again, and even now I judge myself for it, but I chose then solo with only my flute to let it go and it was good.    I packed up my flute and went in to speak to Jun-San, in Japanese so that she would understand. I literally said. My Bicycle Walk is over. I accept your words. It was difficult for me, but now all is well. She replied in a very honorable way, touching my feet and calling me a bodhisattva... I nearly blush now... and the ego roars the louder. Then I sat and fell dark again when I realized that that might mean that I'd be leaving, and sure enough, when I looked deep inside, that was the path I was to choose. I began saying my good-byes little by little and quietly. Always I am challenged by it. Wishing I could speak with everyone but afraid of my inner straight drama queen. So did my short part in the scouts end... I've now returned to where I belong, in the land of music. Concetta has left, somewhat upset with me. Shipped her bike home and headed to Savannah. Ruthie is still on the walk, walking with her bike (it's her flag) and I hope she's still stopping to talk to people and riding to catch up. Truth is, the advance scouts will survive regardless of me, Jun-San, or any other person, and it's a true and deep vision that will come to pass.    The walkers and the riders will work together to make peace in this world. What, indeed, happens when the Tortoise greets the Hare? Shalom Tyler TOP